You don't have to be flashy

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Do you sometimes sit with a group of friends as they trade tales of their big adventures? And do you ever think to yourself, “My life is not that splashy?”

I’ve always loved listening to great speakers. When I was a kid, my dad would take me for a long drive every Saturday morning in his little red Alfa Romeo convertible. On the way he’d play cassette tapes of inspirational keynote speeches by world-class orators.

Many times those people had dramatic stories of overcoming enormous odds or achieving great feats. The drama of their circumstances made their points powerfully. 

For a long time, I believed that without something like a near-death experience or achieving a world record in base jumping, I lacked compelling stories and the authority to share them.

Then, on a whim one afternoon, I took a storytelling workshop. A woman named Ann marie taught it in a small, crowded, room at a downtown club with a speakeasy vibe. (Yep, you actually had to pull a hidden lever that opened a trap door to get in.) 

At that class I got to listen to one story from each participant. Those stories were not about epic experiences like escaping an erupting volcano or getting invited to dinner with the Dalai Lama. They were descriptions of the everyday experience of being human. 

They were about the regret of letting a friend down, the guilt of stealing a five dollar bill from a father’s wallet as an eight-year-old, and the teacher who helped a woman realize that she had talent back when she was just a little girl. They were about normal life and they were POWERFUL!

Think of a story that has shaped you. It’s likely it was simple, and yet it’s become an important part of you. Hearing someone tell the truth about their experience is an honor, isn’t it? 

Today I hope you’re encouraged that your stories are valuable gifts with which you can impact other people in special ways. 

Your experiences, your learning, and your very being make a profound difference in the world. Thank you for that!

With love,
Lisa

The purpose of Advice Column is to share uplifting reminders to connect with the best in yourself, others, and the world.

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Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

Hello friend, welcome to the audio version of the Advice Column newsletter. And today I wanted to ask if you've ever sat with a group of friends as they trade details of their big adventures and you ever think to yourself my life is just not that splashy. I've always loved listening to great speakers and great storytellers, joke tellers, and when I was a kid, my dad would take me for a long drive every Saturday morning in his little red sports car. He had this little red alpha Romeo convertible and he would drive me to a tennis lesson with my brother and sister every Saturday morning is about 45 minute drive each way and the whole way there in back he would play tapes of inspirational stories. So he'd pop in a cassette tape. We'd listened to an amazing story of someone who overcame a huge obstacle, someone who had perseverance, someone who chose a positive attitude, and we would talk about the moral of the story and what we could learn from those inspirational tales. And I love those. I love them very much and they became a part of who I am and I'm so grateful for them. The thing is, many times those people had really really dramatic stories and it made me think that the drama of their circumstance is what gave them the authority and the power to tell that story or to have something worth learning from. And while I think that that's very true, the more phenomenal the experience you know, the adversity and hardship that they overcame made their stories powerful. I also have come to believe that we don't need to have something like a near death experience or achieving a world record in base jumping to be compelling as a storyteller, and that your stories can have power in the beauty of the everyday life experiences that you're collecting.

Speaker 1: 2:01

So one afternoon I took a storytelling workshop at this club in San Diego that is in a speakeasy, and it literally is like you enter a room with a trap door, you pull a book and another door springs open and you go into this little room and well, actually a pretty big club and in there is a small room where about 10 of us did this storytelling workshop with a wonderful coach storyteller teacher named Ann Marie Hofthaling, and in that workshop every single person in the room shared a story from their life. So we practiced sharing something and I got to listen to each person in that room share something, and none of them were dramatic things like escaping and erupting volcano or the time that they went to dinner with the Dalila. They were descriptions of everyday experiences of being human. They were about the regret of letting a friend down, the guilt of stealing a $5 bill from a parent's wallet as an eight year old, or the teacher that helped one of the women establish the direction of her career by recognizing that she had a talent and really changing the trajectory of her whole life because of noticing her talent.

Speaker 1: 3:22

So I want to, I guess, prompt you to maybe reflect on a story that shaped you. And was it a big caroing tale? Maybe, but maybe it was just something simple that someone shared with you about their own life and it's become an important part of you, because hearing someone tell the truth about their experience to me feels like a huge honor, and I hope that you're encouraged that your stories are valuable gifts that you can have impact with and that your experiences, your learning and your very being on the planet make a profound difference in the world. So I just want to leave you with that and maybe put a little bug in your ear to reflect on the stories that you contain within you and maybe encourage you to share them. Alright, I'll see you in the next video.